Quizzes:"Wondering if he'll sizzle or fizzle between the sheets? Whether you're curious about the new guy you're dating or the cutie in the next cubicle, experts say that a man's everyday behavior is a good indicator of his sexual performance. "But give a guy a fair chance, because your perception of him may change after a few dates," stresses Patti Britton, Ph.D., author of "The Art of Sex Coaching." However, she also points out that how you do anything is how you do everything (in other words, a selfish jerk during the day isn't about to become a soul-searching sensitive lover at night). Want to know if he'll impress you in the sack? This quiz will reveal all!
1. Fess up: You think he'll be a sexual dynamo because he has the biggest feet you've ever seen.
a. True
b. False
2. When you two watch a game on TV, your sports fanatic:
a. Has one too many beers and passes out at halftime.
b. Disses the ref and throws potato chips at the screen.
c. Does his own play-by-play.
d. Sits quietly, because he's afraid to jinx his team.
3. You're having a Starbucks night when — gasp! — there's a lull in the conversation. You bring up the inspiring book you just read, and he:
a. Starts talking about his favorite coffee shop in Paris.
b. Asks who your favorite author is.
c. Starts playing footsie with you under the table.
d. Admits that he only reads when he's in the john.
4. When driving, this is a guy who:
a. Always asks you to buckle up.
b. Cruises slower than your grandma.
c. Guns it through yellow lights.
d. Abuses the horn while yelling expletives.
5. You've discovered something about your movie tastes:
a. You've both rented "Old School" about 40 times.
b. He quotes sci-fi trilogies while you've got a fetish for '80s horror.
c. You share the same deep aversion to Paulie Shore flicks.
d. He doesn't care what you watch, as long as he can cop a feel in the dark. You pass on the PDA.
6. Dinnertime! Your suggestion to try the new, exotic restaurant downtown falls on deaf ears.
a. True.
b. False.
7. You just bought a state-of-the-art entertainment system. After opening the box, Mr. Handy:
a. Hooks it up sans instructions. Seems like he's done this before!
b. Mixes up all the wires. Luckily you're there to untangle him.
c. Starts muttering curse words and heads directly for the couch.
d. Checks out the instructions and asks for help with the diagrams.
Toke this test from the last guy I was with and this is what my scores added up to:
He's a Sex God in Training!:A little guidance from you in bed and this man could become your lean, mean loving machine! There's also a good chance he'll find you so incredibly hot that, if you ever split up and he's gone his own way. He will mentally, compare other women to you, and miss the mind-blowing-fun he had in the bedroom with you. So don't be too quick to pull the plug: "What he lacks in skill he could make up for in enthusiasm!....( If read by my X- not meant to offend you, it's just a test.)
Go-ahead take the test tell me what your's said about your male, choosing. Is it a red light..Watch-out? Or a Green-light..GO- for it.."
" SEXPOT psychiatrist Dr. Cynthia Mesner turns timid and tittering geeks into swaggering studs with an exciting new psychiatric technique that relies on the Freud-like power of her 38-DD breasts! Deep-trance modification therapy with mammary adjunct" or "nip-notism," as the unorthodox doctor herself prefers to call the technique "is useful" in lulling nerds, Weird Harolds and other girl-shy guys into an altered state. As they continue to stare helplessly at her fully-exposed fun bags that's right, she works topless -- Mesner breathlessly whispers a series of "post nip-notic" suggestions that her patients will obey long after she's snapped them out of their trance. "I tell them they're 'hunky' and 'stud muffins' and say that everywhere they go, they'll drive women wild with desire," "The technique is far more effective than conventional hypnotherapy. Just getting these young men to look at my chest after I pop the buttons on my blouse is a major accomplishment. "But it sets the stage for them to grapple with and then conquer their fear of the opposite sex. "With hypnosis alone, we expect every patient to need additional treatment, and only three of 10 will ever learn to be comfortable around females. "With nip-notism, nine of 10 will go on to lead exciting and meaningful new lives as studs." The curvy 32-year-old doctor and former Watermelon Queen says she developed nip-nosis after noticing that men who asked for help with women often couldn't bring themselves to make eye contact with her. "One morning I was counseling a young man who wouldn't stop staring at the floor so I walked around my desk and lifted his head up with my right hand and forced him look at me," she recalls. "He was fighting to turn away, so I ripped off my blouse and bra with my left hand and screamed at him, 'Look! Look! They're shirt puppies, yes but they won't bite you!' "He calmed down instantly and, believe it or not, his voice dropped two octaves, from a tittering falsetto to a rich baritone. "I knew then and there I was on to something. "So I went to work to develop the full nip-notic technique that I'm using today, which is a marriage of otherwise conventional hypnotherapy, psychoanalysis and 'tough love' techniques." The sizzling psychiatrist charges $250 an hour for her services and there's a wait of up to six months for an appointment. She accepts insurance and, amazingly, most companies pay for nip-notic sessions. "Dr. Cynthia took me from dud to stud in just one session," testifies one ex-nerd. "At the age of 24, I was a virgin who'd never even been out on a date. And now, just six weeks after she nip-notised me, I've got 18 'babe notches' in the headboard over my bed." 
